Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later.

The Fux News Channel, that bastion of “fair and balanced” jackhammering, has decided (because they are so fair and balanced) to produce a Stephen Colbert/Jon Stewart-like (counter)program called “The 1/2 hour show.” The folks at Fux aren’t very creative in matters of titling. As is reported below, this show will no doubt have people in stitches:

1/2 Hour News Hour, which debuted tonight on Fox News, is not funny. But too few laughs is the least of the problems this Daily Show wannabe brings to the table. Of far greater concern is that 1/2 Hour undermines Fox News far better than even the Daily Show or Colbert Report ever could. Viewed another way, what is the Fox audience supposed to think when a show advertised as comedy that clearly seeks to emulate the satirical Comedy Central shows, delivers a program no different than any Fox News show but for a laugh track?
Instead of Sean Hannity zingers about polar bears and global warming you get 1 liners and skits about polar bears and global warming. Instead of Bill O’Reilly shouting down Hollywood liberals you get 1 liners about Hollywood liberals. And while the Fox News audience is not known for being perceptive, the similarities between Fox comedy and Fox news are not subtle. In fact, the contrived targets, both people and issues, are basically the same.
Perhaps the best illustration of the dilemma is seen in the debut episodes opening “jokes” involving Senator Hillary Clinton. Before 1/2 Hour’s debut, Fox News had spent almost every day for 10+ years skewering Hillary to the point that much of the country views her as a cartoonish villain. So, when 1/2 Hour jokes that President Hillary would staff the White House with angry lesbians it’s hardly funny. Dick Morris has said essentially the same thing on the O’Reilly Factor more times than I care to remember. And you can basically assume the same problem will arise for every politician and celebrity that 1/2 Hour targets.
Conservative humor is not funny. It’s not funny to watch people try to be funny, and it’s not funny when people try to act funny by spouting hate (it’s funny watching THEM but the hateful jokes aren’t funny). This is why conservatives could not create an effective filmic response to “Fahrenheit 9/11.” The few attempts were an uneasy mix of “information,” “Rebuttal,” and hate. These people do not know how to temper their hate with good humor or irony. It is this characteristic of so-called “conservatives” that explains why Ann Coulter’s calling John Edwards was not funny. Jokes about gay people can be funny. Jokes about people who aren’t gay but who act gay can be funny. Jokes about the idea of Dr. McBigot (Isaiah Washington – another black male dripping with homophobia) having to enter “rehab” for expressing his homophobia can be funny. But Ann Coulter calling John Edwards a “faggot” is not funny because she, a vicious and banal bigot, is telling the joke to achieve a bigoted effect to an audience full of bigots for no purpose other than to “shock.” Where was the actual humor in this joke? Humor involves juxtaposition, irony, plays on words, rhyming, teasing, sudden reversals, last-minute revelations, and the unexpected. Spouting hate involves none of these, which is why conservatives are not funny.


Bill Clinton parsed words, some say, when he famously declares, “That depends upon what the meaning of the word “is” is.” A funny joke derived from this line is: how did Bill Clinton defend himself against the latest charges of sexual harassment? By saying, “That depends upon what the meaning of the word “Jiz” is.” It rhymes. It makes a point. It shows how he is a sex fiend and mealy mouthed THROUGH using rhyming and absurdity. In Coulter’s case, the would-be point is not made through creativity. The HATE is the point, and the point is the hate. Not funny.

By the way, I am sick and fucking tired of people who ought to know better claiming that Fux News, although it is not real news, requires the viewer to wear earmuffs, and gives one a headache, nonetheless is redeemed because it is “pro-Israel.” Jews who haven’t drank the Kool-Aid know this to be true. Whenever some blond chicklet-fucked anorexic Fux anchor talks about the “secular humanist terrorist agenda to destroy Christmas,” what group of people do you think said blond chicklet-fucked anorexic Fukster is talking about? Christians? No. Gays They are bashed separately. Muslims? Ditto. It’s this JEWS in their “elite” universities running the “elite” media. And when Fux News defends Mel Gibson’s latest bigoted tirade against Jews, that means that Fux is not pro-Jewish, too. Really. I mean, how fucking dumb are the people who still think that “pro-Israel” means “pro-Jewish”? The Jerry Fatwells and Pat Bigotsons of the world are laughing over what suckers these people are. Fox News is only “pro-Israel” to the extent that it is bigoted against Muslims (said bigotry being general conservative hatred of “the other” rather than action-specific bigotry) and is PRO-CHRISTIAN. Wake up, people. Or are you secular Jews who don’t even know what it means to be pro-Israel because you know nothing about the religion and just hate Muslims SO desperate to comform that you’ll continue to allow the anti-Semitism to continue?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.